Tag Archives: gut feeling

Freedom has a price.

freedom-isnt-freeOn Independence Day especially, I contemplate the countless freedoms we enjoy in the United States of America.  Our freedom was paid for with the blood of patriots, and our unalienable rights set forth in the Declaration of Independence include “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”

Your own freedom also has a price.

In order to maintain and enjoy your personal freedom, you must not infringe upon the rights of others; obey local, state, and national laws; pay your bills; and make good choices with regard to mental and physical health and safety.

If you break the law, you may lose your freedom through incarceration.  If you fail to be financially responsible, you could lose the comfort and security of your home, your means of transportation, or even face incarceration.  If you aren’t a good steward of your physical body and mind, you may lose your freedom of movement, forfeit your sight, or even face an early demise due to your own poor decisions.

Making safe choices for yourself can help ensure your own freedom from harm, threat, or grievous injury.   Be aware, stay alert, and be present and thoughtful in your choices and decisions, so you can enjoy the countless freedoms we as Americans – and you as an individual – have.

God bless America.  Stay safe!

 

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No is a complete sentence.

Verbal self defense“No” is a complete sentence.  Anything else either clarifies or amplifies your message.  In terms of self defense, anyone who won’t take “no” for an answer likely doesn’t have your best interest in mind.

It’s okay to say No:

  • No, thank you.
  • No, I don’t want your help.
  • No, I won’t give you my phone number.
  • No, I can’t help you.
  • No, you can’t sit with me.
  • No, I’m not interested.
  • No, I’ll take the next elevator.
  • No, I’ll take the next cab.
  • No, I don’t want to sit with you.
  • No, I won’t go up to your room.
  • No, you can’t join us.
  • No, I’m not okay with that.
  • No, you can’t come in.
  • No, I don’t want to share a cab with you.
  • No, you can’t use my phone.
  • No, you can’t call me.
  • No, I won’t be your Facebook friend.
  • No, you can’t sit with us.
  • No, I won’t loan you $20.
  • No, I won’t let you give me a ride.
  • No, I’m not going anywhere with you.
  • No.

Any of these sentences has the potential to save you from a compromising or dangerous situation, if you’ll simply say the words and mean them.  And if the person doesn’t respond appropriately, know in advance what you’ll do next…and do it with conviction.

Visit www.redrivertkd.com or contact the author directly at redrivertkd@gmail.com.

Stay safe!

A Nice Guy, or a Good Guy?

man-male-happy-face-guy-portrait-198949My friend was talking about a man who had stalked, restrained and physically attacked a woman we knew when she said, “But he’s basically a good guy.”  Shocked, I clarified:  “No, he’s a nice guy.  Definitely not a good guy.”

A nice guy, or a good guy?

We both knew this person.  He had been a guest in both of our homes.  He was attractive, charming, likable and a great conversationalist, making him very pleasant company.  However, beneath the surface, his niceness paled in comparison to his aggression, threatening behavior and willingness to put others at risk.

Yes, we all have bad days. We all have triggers that can cause us to behave unlike our better selves.  But someone who deliberately intimidates, terrorizes or attacks another person?  That’s not a good person.

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Believe Them the First Time – 6 Questions to Help You “Hear” Your Inner Voice

When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time.When someone shows you who he is, believe him the first time. Don’t wait for him to show you again.  If we’d all actually believe our eyes and ears and listen to our gut feelings, we’d avoid a lot of pain and heartache.  From business relationships to dating, and from online communications to in-person meetings, you can believe what people tell you…if you know how to listen.

I met someone recently I liked and felt comfortable with almost instantly.  This is rare for me, and was almost a “red flag” in and of itself.  However, when I considered what I knew about this person, that added context increased my comfort level, as did his willingness to answer questions directly and share relevant historical, professional and personal information.  We discussed appropriate topics, he respected my personal space, and allowed me to set the pace of our meeting.

What’s the context?  How long have you known this person? How did you meet?  Do you have shared business associates or friends, or did you simply meet by chance or through a shared activity or common location? Continue reading